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Did you know, statistically people tell an average of 1,000 lies per year to others? Seems like the amount of little white lies people tell themselves can be dangerous to their mental, emotional and physical health. Most people don’t even know they are lying.  It’s a method of denial that can help some feel better about themselves and their perception of the world. Whilst some may think that this reaction is harmless, look at the list below and check if these are some of the untruths you’ve been telling yourself.

Take a look at these top beliefs and lies.

My happiness is from outside events that I have no control over.  The belief that we have no control over our own happiness sets us on a path to upset and disappointment.  This is a belief that happiness only happens to a few ‘selected’ others. That somehow it’s fine for others but doesn’t work for you.

I did it and want it MY way.  Everyone must have goals or targets in life, but if the outcome of your goals is your main or only reason for happiness, you could be living with unreasonable expectation of yourself and others. Naturally, if you check in with the energy of all that is, there are often some better ways to achievements than just 'your way'.  Check to see if you are imposing  unreasonable expectations on yourself and other loved ones in your life.

Happiness is defined by my achievements.  Many people’s egos urge them to believe that their value and happiness is defined by external factors like work, achievements, targets.  This could be a raise at work, a sporting event or game, or winning an argument with a spouse, friend or lover.  Check to see if you are punishing yourself or others over having not yet achieved all you wish in life. 

To be loved, I must be agreeable to others. Some people find it really hard to say no. Others find it equally hard to say yes. You may have said no a few times, seen upset in people’s faces, and vowed to be a yes person.  The problem here is that this may result in you giving up your own life to enhance that of others. This can appear to be generous. In fact, there’s nothing wrong with being kind, loving and generous. The problems occur if you become resentful over what you have given.  They can also happen when you don’t know how to say no because of fear of what others may think.  You may have a fear that you are unlovable and unwanted if you displease someone else who has the above belief, ‘’ I did it and want it all MY way.’’ Equally, those who find it hard to say yes to friends, lovers or spouses may hold the same belief that it has to be done ‘their’ way always.

I must be approved and loved by others.  You may wish for the approval of others. It can become a painful obstacle if you build your life around satisfying others, and procrastinate, or forget about your own needs.  This can lead to one or all of the three R’s, resentment, rejection, regret.

If only I had time … Some people often tell themselves they don’t have time to do what they truly want to. There are 2 issues in that. This can be an excuse designed to give us an easy way out of our fears of failure or success. Two, if we are truly that busy, most likely you are giving attention to what is more important to you, but you may not have told yourself the truth in that. I remember being asked how I found time to make my own mayonnaise. During that time I was running my own business, home, relationship, travelling a lot, and teaching numerous courses.  I have time to do whatever I want to. You can make time for all, in order to have a full life. You may need to start changing some core beliefs.

A white lie never hurts.  This is one of the biggest lies of all because it creates upset. If you try to protect yourself from life by lying, you are wounding yourself.  Sometimes in life we must experience upset in order to know what true success, love, and happiness is,. If you find you have experienced too much disappointment, it’s time to change your belief system.  Start by knowing it’s alright to learn through joy now.  If you want to learn through joy, Theta Healing can help you.  Take a look at our session’s page to discover what subconscious beliefs are no longer serving you.

What are your favourite lies that people tell themselves… or should stop telling? You are welcome to fill in the comments form and share your experiences or questions.

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The Mind 09/07/2010
 
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Have you ever continuously sent out a strong emotional thought of, "I really don't want XYZ to happen", and somehow you only attract that situation into your life?  Why is this?  If we are truly powerful manifesting beings, why do we sometimes manifest what we really don't want to occur?  There may have a variety of personal excuses and explanations for this, yet the most basic understanding is that, "whatever we resist, will persist."  It is a paradoxical world we live in and the key to transcending it is to embrace everything and resist nothing.  The only way to master life is to be at peace with it and within it.
 
Any time you put up an inner energetic/emotional wall and resist anything or anyone, you'll find that your mind is fiercely focusing upon the negative aspects of what you don't want, instead of thinking about what you really want to manifest in your life.  Vibrationally, we are like magnets and only attract that which we continuously focus upon with great emotion.  So if you can stop focusing upon something, you'll stop resisting it and stop manifesting it.  However to control the mind takes great awareness, patience and love.  It also takes knowing your true divine infinite nature that fears absolutely nothing.  For as divine beings, we've all set it up so that every little thing that we focus on grows, expands and returns to us naturally like a boomerang.  You cannot get rid of your inherent manifesting magnet nature. If you could choose somehow train your mind to obsessively resist feelings of joy, love, abundance and gratitude, it'd be a fantastic way of manifesting those aspects into your life.

 "Become more and more innocent, less knowledgeable and more childlike. 
Take life as fun - because that's precisely what it is!" ~Osho

Perhaps you may have noticed this resistance habit show up in your relationships?  Have you ever noticed when you start to think something is "wrong" about somebody or believe that they truly "should" be more like you or different, your body instantly tightens contracts and goes into "resistance mode".  This internal rejection of life is a ridiculous attempt to protect the ego in some way and is an ignorance of our Divine Nature.  It's good to know that your ego is like a shadow.  When you get close to it, you discover that there is nothing really there!  Sure, it seems real, yet is simply an illusionary contracted ball of festering belief systems blocking the brilliant light of your own infinite being.  When someone makes fun of you (your ego) truly nobody is under attack.  How can you attack a shadow?  The ego is a juicy, fragmented yet false figment of your mind's imagination.  The day that you realize what your ego is, is the same moment your eyes open to see that you are truly a divine infinite blessed being.  
 
"The real Self is eternal. It has no origin and no end. The other "I" is born and dies.
 It is impermanent." ~Ramana Maharishi
 
Life is here to be explored and experienced on every level.  Even resistance is a valid experience that needs to be explored.  How else could you know what freedom was unless there was some release of resistance?  Once you discover the Divine essence that you truly are, you will be freed from who you think you are and what you usually resist.  It's good to know that resistance is simply a subtle form of fear.  If you can embrace your fear with love, then ALL resistance dissolves.  Eventually one day you will no longer resist anything, see everything as connected to the Divine and embrace it all.  That is the day that you will have discovered the Divine Beings we all truly are and will have truly transcended all future suffering. 
 
To be totally free from resistance is to master your mind.  The mind is easily trained when your body remains absent from fear.  If you are resisting any aspect of life, you are focusing (on some level) on what you fear.  Fear is that one thing people resist the most.  It was created by a great misunderstanding; that you are separate from a loving Infinite Source.  You can transcend all fear in your life by simply welcoming it.  This can only be done by confining yourself to the present moment when the fear arises.  Feel the fearful feeling, yet do not imprison yourself in its thoughts and feelings, go deeper...through it...and surrender to the presence of your eternal being.  Find the river of consciousness that penetrates you and surrounds you.  When you discover this river, you will find a much greater understanding of resistance and the freedom to release it. 

By Alexandra P. Brown (c) all rights reserved
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Only you can do it, and you can’t do it alone. 
                  Cat and mouse true story.

This morning started out as usual. Yerba Mate Tea, checking e mails and then off for a walk with a friend through the gardens.  It was a beautiful sunny fresh morning.  We chatted, walked, looked at the flowers and laughed.  I came home with nothing but the thoughts of a lovely breakfast, soft boiled eggs, delicious. Everything changed when I went to open my kitchen door.
I saw my cats entranced by something behind the door I’d opened.

Sneaking a peek I saw this tiny gorgeous little mouse behind the door, petrified for it’s life. As well it might be!  Cute as they are (see pic) they’re lethal when they want to be. I kept the door jammed open but inaccessible to the cats (mouse hidden in corner behind door) and let what seemed like a tidal wave of thoughts move through my head in seconds.

All these thoughts rushed through my head at once. Literally at the speed of light, a jumble of different scenarios of what to do.  First off came the ‘oh it’s just nature, don’t interfere’. Then came the mother instinct to the dear sweet mouse, shouldn’t I try and rescue it?  As soon as I thought that, panic set it.

How on earth was I going to catch a mouse and keep it away from my cats at the same time.  My head spun back to I can’t and it’s just nature, leave it alone. Thankfully the mouse’s cute face had stuck in my head and ashamed to say it, so had the idea of the ensuing mess that could happen. Entrails would be left all over my lovely carpet, gruesome I thought. Knowing my cats it occurred to me that they would torture the poor thing for hours and certainly this wasn’t ‘nature’ as they are a rather well fed pampered pair. They definitely didn’t need to eat this mouse.

 I still had this thought of ‘I can’t’.  Truth is I could if I had to, but so much easier and more fun with help!  Finally I got  the idea to get my friend who happens to be a neighbour and ask her to help. Oh there was a light bulb moment. Why is it we think we have to do things all alone?  I just knew she’d be great, she’s an animal lover and has rescued other animals and birds in distress.  She came in, somehow managed to bring with her a plant pot (handy that) and some card from the hallway to place under it. I got the cats right out and locked them in a room. She talked sweetly to the mouse and got it and took it to a safer place outside and into the lovely gardens. 

So what do you do when you think something’s just natural?  Is it just natural to hold onto beliefs of a lifetime because they have become part of you, or would you like to change them?  I know only you can do it, and you can’t do it alone. Sometimes we just need a little helping hand with tricky beliefs and thoughts, just like I needed a hand with the mouse. At Theta Healing Academy we specialise in helping you change subconscious beliefs that have been holding you back from living the life you love.  Check out our sessions page if you’d like some help.

By Alexandra P. Brown (c) all rights reserved
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